Faith Questions

At church our pastor, Andy has been leading a series called, "Big".  He has been highlighting that we need to be praying in big ways.

A lot has been going on in my church family and there are many things that require me to pray big prayers.  Here is a list of some of the big prayers I want to  faithfully pray:

-Heal CG from lymphatic cancer   -Heal my friend from malignant breast cancer   -Give some dear friends a healthy baby   - Heal a friends unborn baby  -send us a child to love and care for  - double the amount of children's volunteers  -double the tithes to our church

I have had a hard time praying well for these things and I think I figured out why. When I was stumbling over this some questions came to mind and I felt called to share them.

1) Do I really believe that God can do or wants to do anything?

2) Can I choose to lead my heart in this even if my mind gets stuck?

3) Is my faith strong enough to understand when God's plan doesn't seem to match up with my big prayers?

4) I want to be okay with God not answering my prayers in the way I hope because I automatically assume the plan is not heal so we depend on Him more.  However, why don't I assume the plan is to heal and to provide abundantly? Why do I think the reality will be the opposite of the miracle?

I have been mulling over all these things today and it has been amazing. Even though there are so many questions I am asking myself, I have felt God's spirit so intimately today.  It feels like a soft pressure in my chest that I believe comes from a growing soul.