Test me in this

Can we pretend for a moment that I don't work for a church?
Let's pretend that I don't get paid to help families understand and connect with God's Word.

I need you to hear me on something and I want to make sure you realize my perspective is not a reflection of my career.

My perspective is a reflection of my experience.

2015 has been a year of incredible blessing for us.  I have always had loving people in my life and enough of the things we need to live. That alone is a blessing and would be enough if it stopped there.

But this year is different.

In a short amount of time, God has blessed us in so many areas that I am not even sure how to say thank you.

Of course, Emily Ann is such a gift that I feel the need to thank The Lord every time I look at her.

But even beyond her.

It sounds backwards but I have been confused by this lately.  I overwhelmingly feel that I do not deserve what He is giving.  I am a broken person. I am critical of others when I shouldn't be and repent for that daily. I catch myself thinking of my needs before those around me and Jesus constantly asks me to lower myself.  My list goes on and I deserve nothing.   I was thanking God and asking myself why all of the sudden it feels like God is continually blessing us and The Spirit reminded me of these words.

"Bring the whole tithe into the temple, that there may be enough in my house. Test me in this,” says the Lord Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of Heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it. "- Malachi 3:10


I believe that we are in this place of blessing now because of our faithfulness before we got to this place. 

Hear me out on this, I believe if you want God's blessing you need to be giving to His work. 
Give with your time and finances to your church and ministries that spread the message of Jesus. 

Before your eyes glaze over and you think I am peddling a wealth gospel, I am not. 
Your timeline may be different than ours. You may sacrificially give for years and not experience a floodgate pouring.  I often thought the "pouring" was in reference to Heaven and maybe it still is for some.   I also wonder if what is holding the "pouring" back for some is us?  What if God has plans to pour out on someone but His believers have their hands clasped shut? 

This is what I gain from this scripture, if you want God to give you a blessing then trust Him with the ones He has already given you. 

A few lines up from Malachi 3:10, God is speaking through the profit and says that people are robbing God. They ask, "How are we robbing you?".  Then God replies with the verse above. 
If I could write my own version of the Bible, I would add that in reality, it seems the person we are robbing when we do not give is ourselves. 


I probably do not directly benefit from challenging you to give sacrificially(unless you go to my church) but I needed you to know. 

Trust God to provide for you. Give a portion back to His mission and see if He leaves you out to dry. 
Test Him.  He said we could. 

Revolving door

A revolving door.

That is what I felt stuck in for 2+ years on our adoption journey. 

Some would describe it as a roller coaster but for me I just really felt like I was walking in a circle and had no idea when the spinning would stop. 

December of last year, it seemed to be slowing down. You can read about it here.

March 4th, the spinning stopped. You can read about that here.

It is amazing how a journey can feel suffocating.  The constant ups and downs for some or the constant feeling on being stuck in a revolving door can be tiring. 

If you are in the waiting process of adoption or infertility(as many of my friends are), I am sorry.  Waiting for something so desperately hoped for is a special kind of pain. 

Once you get to the other side though, once the door stops spinning, you gain clarity. 

I was reading something today and I felt the need to pass it on if you feel like you are stuck walking in circles. 

Oswald Chambers writes in My Utmost for His Highest:

God gives us a vision and then He takes us down to the valley to batter us in the shape of that vision. It is in the valley that many of us give up and faint.  Every God-given vision will become real if we have patience. It is in the valley that God has to put us through fires and floods to batter us into shape, until we get to the point where He can trust us with the reality of the vision.  Ever since God gave the vision, He has been at work.  Over and over we try to escape from the Sculptor's hand in an effort to batter ourselves into our own shape.  Allow the Potter to put you on His wheel and whirl you around as He desires. Don't lose heart, you will turn out as an exact likeness of that vision. 

The spinning or revolving is not useless. 

It has a purpose. 

You have a purpose and your waiting is a result of God wanting His purpose fulfilled in you.

Don't give up. His plan is perfect.